Whose Love is This Anyway?
Is it yours or mine? Ours or no ones? To each of these questions, I would say yes! Love is yours, mine, our’s and nobody’s—simultaneously.
Is love a noun or verb or adjective? For example, i) this is love ii) I love you, iii) he is a loving man. Love is all these.
Who is doing the loving? Is it me or you? Do they love? (Whoever “they” are, we just know it’s not “us.”) Who is asking? I believe that when we find ourselves truly in the heart of love, there is no one; there is only one. And so we are simply love.
So. let us skip agency, stop “trying” to “be” loving or insist others be more loving towards us. Let love be the unspoken word that rises above the grammar and chatter of our lives.
If, instead, we let love be the architect of our lives what will it build?
A shimmering palace? A diamond spire? A majestic cathedral? A humble hut?
Love can build all these things. And yet love builds none of these. When love is the architect of your life, it unlocks your heart for there are no doors to lock, only hinges to fall loose. There is no one to let in, and there is no one to keep out. There are no walls to put up, only walls to tear down. There is no roof to erect, only the night sky to let come pouring in.
To love is to give ourselves up. Not easy. It’s hard to give ourselves up. We may not alway like our “selves,” but we’re certainly attached to them; little selves all running around, running amok, causing mischief.
Still, we can change how we relate to the concept of love. We can begin to loosen our tenuous grasp on what we think is love. We don’t have to make a choice to do this for all time, but only for this moment, and then next one, and so on.
And then, eventually, we may see a deeper truth emerge. We may see that we can release the ball of string from our fist entirely and let the kite soar unfettered in the sky.
We can untangle the tangle.
When we do this, we will see that we are not left holding the string. We get to float free. We may see that that in letting go into love, there is nothing to give up.
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